A hui hou kakou (Until we meet again)
by RaeBeth13
Summary: Steve's happiness is turned upside down when he receives some devastating news that leaves him powerless, betrayed and torn.
1. Chapter 1

The warm breeze enveloped the group as Mother Nature put on one of the most breathtaking displays, the sun setting over the turquoise water, vibrant colors shifted in the sky marking its decent over the horizon. The smell of paradise was in the air with the scent of Frangipani's being swept softly in the gentle wind.

It was the 4th of July. Red, white and blue decorations seemed to cover every inch of the back yard of McGarrett house, tables and chairs took up a segment of the lawn and the grill was heating, in preparation for the feast they had planned.

Steve stood on the Lanai, a beer bottle secured in his hand, as he looked over the group of people he considered O'hana. He took a moment to reflect on how this family had been built, people who came from all walks of life, coming together time and time again to share each other's company.

He'd come to this island five years ago, to bury his father. Everything, aside from the man he'd just lost, that he loved about this island had vanished long ago. Now it was just a place, filled with heartache and tragedy. Not for one second, on that military plane into O'ahu, did he believe he would stay. Not for one second did he believe that he would find peace back in the place that had taken so much from him or that he would ever discover that, even in the Navy, he didn't have the happiness and meaning he'd longed for until he took his oath and created Five-0.

His eyes skimmed over the faces. Kono and Danny were in the kitchen as they plated up some snacks. Chin, Adam, Lou, Renee and Ellie sat at a table outside, laughing as they chatted. Jerry and Max had challenged each other to a game of chess with Duke standing close to referee.

Samantha, Grace and Charlie ran in and out of the ankle slappers, splashing and yelling with glee in their voices. Mary and Deb sat on the sand watching them as Joan scoured for sea shells. He was proud, he was content and he knew there was no other place on earth that felt more like home than this island. He had all the family he needed right here.

He smiled softly as he leant against a wooden beam as he watched Lyn interact with his team, it was like she had always been there, like she'd known them for years. God he loved everything about her. A match so perfect it had shocked him. She wasn't military but she was adventurous and bubbly and for the 9 months they had been together, she had been there for him without question and knew instinctively when to step back if he needed to be alone.

"You look happy." Danny said suspiciously as he walked up next to Steve. "Should I be worried?"

"I got a lot to be happy about." Steve nodded.

"Okay buddy, you should lay off the adult drinks and stick to the soda's." Danny answered dryly before he looked towards Lyn. "She's a keeper." He nodded.

Steve glanced at Danny and smiled softly. "Yep." He exhaled with contentment. "I think you're right."

"Just do me a favor." Danny continued. "Don't make her wait too long. You got this. You deserve this."

Steve's smile broadened, he appreciated Danny's words.

"Yo, McGarrett." Kamekona called out as he and Flipper appeared from the house with their arms cradling bottles of longboards and bags of shrimp hanging from their fingers. "I got the merch you asked me to get."

"You, my friend, are a legend." Steve replied with excitement.

"A legend?" Danny frowned softly. "What could he possibly have done to be granted that kind of title?"

"I got fireworks." Kamekona answered proudly.

"Please tell me that's not code for anything else but the things that light up the sky in a festive manner." Danny answered with his hands waving up in front of him.

"Nah, bro. All legit." Kamekona replied.

"Ah." Danny nodded. "And I take it you have a permit for those fireworks?" he asked Steve.

Steve hesitated. "I mean; I have a badge."

"A badge?" Danny nodded with curiosity. "Like a boy scout, pyromaniac badge?"

"No. A badge that says immunity and means." Steve replied.

Danny thinned his eyes with uncertainty to Steve's thinking.

"And you have experience with handling explosives." Flipper added.

"Yeah, a handful of tours in the Middle East that gave me that." Steve nodded. "How hard can it be?"

"Hold my beer." Danny said as he handed the bottle over to Steve.

"What are you doing?" Steve asked.

"I'm going to get cash out at the ATM for the bail you are going to need by the time the night is through." He answered.

"Relax." Kamekona answered. "My cousin works at the Hilton, he's in charge of the weekly fireworks. He's coming down to set them off."

Steve grinned at Danny.

"Funny." He growled as he grabbed his beer back.

"Boss…" Kono said as she stood at the external door to the house, her face filled with uncertainty.

Steve looked at her. "Kono, you okay?"

"Joe's here." She answered.

Steve was surprised but unsure why that would be a concern to Kono. "Tell him to come out here, the beers on ice."

She hesitated for a moment. "He's with an officer from the Navy. They want to speak to you."

Steve's smile faded, for the life of him he couldn't think what it was about, but he knew it was something important. "Okay." He nodded as he passed his beer to Danny and disappeared inside.

"You know what it's about?" Danny asked.

"No." she shook her head and swallowed. "But Joe looked pretty upset."

"One day. Just for one day it would be nice if that woman could just stay out of his life." Danny growled as he passed the two beers to Flipper and started for the door.

"Wait, you think this is about Doris?" Kono frowned.

"I'd lay money on it." Danny nodded as he followed Steve.

Steve walked into the living room to find Joe and Commander Aaron O'Neil, someone who Steve had worked with many times before, standing by the door. "Sir…" he nodded. "Joe."

Danny stepped into the room and hovered behind him.

"Steve, I was hoping we could speak to you privately." O'Neil nodded.

He turned to notice Danny. "It's okay, sir. This is my partner, Detective Danny Williams."

O'Neil looked to Joe for some kind of sign. Joe nodded with approval.

"Please, come in. Take a seat." Steve offered them, extending his arm toward the chairs.

They both obliged, Danny remained where he stood.

Steve waited until the pair were seated before sitting down himself. "I'm sorry, sir. I'm a little confused."

"You're aware of the current situation in the middle east. The latest threat being Islamic State and their conduct, notably in Syria?" O'Neil answered.

"Of course." Steve nodded.

"What you may not know is that the beheadings of foreign nationals, though not as frequently reported by the media, is still a weekly event. Hostages from all parts of the world, reporters, voluntary health care workers, refugee camp staff, soldiers and agents have been grabbed and taken to many undisclosed locations where they are kept for weeks and used as bargaining chips in an effort to sway how the west should proceed in the current conflict."

Steve nodded gently.

"In the past three months, the victims have mostly been European and Japanese nationals, but when word came through three weeks ago that the CIA had lost contact with three agents within Syria, they knew our turn was coming."

Steve's heart skipped a beat as he connected the dots. Doris was one of those agents.

"Five days ago, a video was sent to the CIA, with all three agents. Their execution time is on track to be in six hours from now." O'Neil continued.

Danny inhaled a deep breath, in one way he was sad for Steve that this is how it was going to end and that Steve had to be a part of it. In another way he had very little sympathy for Doris.

"So you're telling me, that in 6 hours, my mother is going to be executed?" Steve asked.

O'Neil frowned.

Joe sighed. "This is not about your mother, Steve." He whispered.

"It's about Lieutenant Rollins." O'Neil replied. "Catherine is one of those agents."

Danny straightened, he was in complete shock but more unsure of what to do next other than study Steve's reaction to the news.

Steve frowned and shook his head. He let out a stifled but nervous laugh. "No, you must have ID'd the wrong person. First of all, Catherine retired from the Navy. Second, she went to Peru to help out with the earthquake recovery."

O'Neil lowered his head.

"Catherine was reinstated to the Navy fourteen months ago, soon after she was recruited by the CIA." Joe answered. "The story about Peru…" he paused "it was a cover, Steve. She was on her way back to Afghanistan to be briefed in an operation which would take her into Iraq and over the boarder to Syria."

Steve felt betrayed again, but as quickly as those emotions flooded him they left. Her actions, her words, her lies were the last thing he should be worried about right now. She was in trouble and his feelings for her, no matter how much he'd moved on, still meant something. His eyes widened as he looked around.

"Steve, I know what you're thinking." Joe started. "You're thinking that you have to help her."

He glared at his old superior.

"But the truth is, you can't do anything in 6 hours." Joe continued. "Your instincts are to try and get over there, but there is not enough time even if there was a direct flight into that part of the world."

"So why are you telling me now?" He growled. "Why didn't you tell me five days ago, when there was a chance for me to get over there?"

"Because at that point we were still sifting through intel on a possible location. We couldn't have given you anything solid on where they were being held." O'Neil replied.

"Okay." Danny said as he stepped forward. "Then why are you telling him now. If there is nothing he could do then why not wait until whatever is done so that he doesn't have to go through this."

"Because it's just about to go public. The media caught the story, and we felt it was better that he heard it from us than from the news." O'Neil answered before looking at Steve. "But there is a reason why I am here, and it's because we have a strong lead on a location now."

Steve looked up to him.

"SEAL team 4 are standing by to go in. The mission time is scheduled in three hours." O'Neil continued.

"If Catherine and the two other agents are in this location, which we strongly believe they are, then they will get them out." Joe added.

"I want to be there, watching the live feed, when this op goes down." Steve whispered.

Joe looked at O'Neil.

O'Neil sighed as he gave Steve's request some thought. "You can be there, but you are not to get involved in any way."

"I understand." Steve nodded.

"Be there 15 minutes before go time. I'll leave Joe here to bring you in." O'Neil answered.

Steve stood up as O'Neil headed for the door and walked out. He looked to Joe. "Two things are going to happen right now, Joe. First, you're going to tell me the full story as to how the hell Catherine got recruited. Then you're going to call Doris, and you're going to tell her that if Cath dies, I'm holding her personally responsible; and I'm coming for her."

Joe glared at him with concern.


	2. Chapter 2

Joe sat down as Steve chose to pace, like a lion stalking its prey with full, uninterrupted eye contact. "I don't know the specifics, but your mother and Catherine got into contact whilst Cath was in Afghanistan."

"Who contacted who?" Steve growled.

"Like I said, I don't know the specifics." Joe answered innocently.

"Joe. So help me god." He snarled

"Okay, okay." Joe answered with his hands up in defeat, he sighed. "The village Catherine was staying in had a CIA asset living there. A private military team was sent in to protect the area, when they found out that Catherine was imbedded already, and that she was ex military, they contacted their superiors and had her instated. I guess that list passed through Doris' hands at some point."

"So my mother contacted her?" Steve snarled.

"Doris asked Catherine if she would consider running some black ops, disguised as a civilian, for the CIA. Catherine declined at first, because she couldn't guarantee the safety of the people in the village if she left. But Doris assured her that the team would be in place for as long as the threat in the area was current. She told her that the operations she would be involved in would contribute to neutralizing the known threats in the area. Therefore she would have a greater impact on providing stability than just waiting for them to push into the village."

Steve looked at Danny, his face filled with a range of emotions. None of them good. "Well, I don't know about you but I really thought there was nothing else this woman could do that would surprise me. Yet here we are." Danny answered, his voice dripping with disgust.

"Catherine was reinstated to her role back in the Navy and drafted by the CIA in an official capacity. She completed the operations, was involved in some fairly large takedowns. Much more than Doris had anticipated. With the threat alleviated somewhat, and the understanding that the team would remain in place until the conflict was over, Catherine asked to return back to O'ahu."

Steve glared at him.

"As far as I knew, she was taking a couple of weeks leave and in that time she was going to decide if she wanted to go back to the Navy or stand down again." Joe added. "Either way, she wanted to be here with you." He paused. "She had every intentions of staying, Steve."

"So what changed?" Steve asked.

Joe glanced at Danny before looking back at Steve. "Your mother called her, said she had missions which she knew Catherine would be ideal for."

"Did she know that Catherine was back here, that she was back with me?" Steve asked.

Joe hesitated. "Yes."

"And she still called her back." Steve hissed with disgust.

"You have to understand, Doris' job demands results and she would do anything and use the best people she has to get those results. Lives depend on it." Joe answered.

"Yeah, at the expense of the happiness of people she is supposed to love." Danny replied.

"Steve, if Catherine hadn't have been caught we wouldn't be having this conversation. You would be none the wiser of what was happening, where she was, what she'd been doing. She would have come back eventually and you would have made your decision on what was to happen with your future accordingly."

"Oh so that makes it okay?" Steve snapped. "That Cath would have come back here telling me lies and looking over her shoulder, just like Doris did? That I wouldn't have known the truth that she chose the CIA over me without a second thought?"

"That's not true." Joe shook his head. "I know for a fact that the decision to leave again was heartbreaking for Catherine."

"She still did it though." He answered.

"Let's just say it wasn't that black and white. Your mother had some fairly compelling reasons for Catherine to go back."

"What does that even mean, Joe?" Steve shouted angrily before pausing, watching Joe lower his head as if he didn't even want to go near answering that. He didn't have to. Steve could finally think the way she did. "She blackmailed her, didn't she?" he growled softly. "What did she say, Joe? Did she threaten to retract the security from the village?" he asked.

Joe offered him nothing.

Steve's eyes widened. "I'm going to kill her. If anything happens to Catherine, I promise you, I will hunt her down and I will kill her." He said menacingly before turning and removing a picture from the wall, revealing a safe.

"Steve, I know you're upset." Joe answered. "But…"

"Wait." Danny said. "What are you doing Steve?"

He reached into the cavity and pulled out his passport and other documents. "I'm going over there myself."

"Have you lost your mind?" Danny snapped. "Aside from the fact that these people are crazies with machetes, you don't have a plan, you don't have a location, you go asking around in a place like that you draw all the wrong attention. How do you think it's going to work out for you?"

"I can't just sit here." Steve argued.

"Danny's right. And like we said, even if you could get a direct flight from here into the country, which you can't, you would still be 40,000 feet in the air at the scheduled time of execution."

"Which is exactly why you didn't tell me this was going down sooner, right Joe? It had nothing to do with intel, nothing to do with it going public. You just didn't want me to get in the way." Steve replied.

"I knew that this would be your knee jerk reaction, and if I was wrong to have kept this from you I am sorry. You going in to this hostile territory, a place where you haven't been before and are not familiar with the operations, you could never have gotten Catherine back by yourself, but would have gotten you killed." Joe paused. "You know that, but you would have still done it anyway. So yes, my decision to keep this quiet was simply to protect you from yourself, nothing more than that."

"You know what? Enough. I've heard enough." Steve whispered as he headed for the front door.

"Steve…" Danny called.

"I'm good." Steve answered dismissively as he disappeared.

Joe slumped back into the chair and looked at Danny. "Go on. Go ahead. Tell me I did the wrong thing?"

Danny straightened and shook his head. "No, I'm not going to tell you that. You and I agree on one thing and that is that Steve going into that place would only end badly for him. For us." He sighed. "Catherine didn't go into this blindly. She knew the risks. But you need to start working out what you are going to do when he goes looking for Doris."

Joe raised his eyebrows. "Well he won't have to look very hard."

Danny glared at him. "She's here? In Hawaii?"

"Got in this morning. She figured that Steve would want to see her."

"Joe, he doesn't want to just see her, he wants to finish her." Danny snapped. "Between the story about Wo Fat, and this… he's got nothing left to say to her."

"There's more to her coming here, and I'm confident that when Steve sees her, sees why she is really back, he will be okay."

Danny laughed. "Joe, nothing can make this right." He snapped. "You hear me? Nothing."

"Well, we'll just have to see." Joe shrugged. "Because I can't stop Doris, and we sure as hell can't stop Steve."

H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50

Steve sat on an old wooden chair in the front yard, away from the celebrations as he held his head in his hands. So many emotions, his heart tearing apart and the mixed feelings tormenting his mind. When Catherine left that day, she had hurt him so badly that he decided he would keep going with his life and never ever look back. What he and Lyn had was incredible and real. It even had aspects that he never experienced with Cath, but she was always there in his thoughts and in his heart. There was nothing he could ever do about that, and if truth be told he didn't really want to do anything about it.

She lived silently in his head, there were so many things on this island that would prompt his memories of her. The house, the ocean, songs, places they used to frequently visit together. She was always there. He was in love with Lyn, but his love for Catherine was still as strong as ever and the only way he could overcome that was knowing she had chosen her path without him. But now, knowing that there was so much more to her departing and her reasons for going, it was not as easy to accept. And now knowing that she was in such grave danger, it only heightened his feelings for her.

Tears escaped from his eyes and down his cheeks, no matter what he was forced to understand that his relationship with Lyn had to be seriously assessed regardless of Catherine's fate. If he wasn't giving her all he had then was he being fair?

"Steve?" Mary said, clutching Joan, as she stepped towards him. She was oblivious to what had happened.

Steve wiped away his tears quickly but it was far too late to hide from someone like Mary, who knew him so well.

"What's going on?" She asked as she perched herself down on the seat next to him.

Steve sighed, his expression filled with bitterness as he glared into nothingness. He paused for what seemed like an eternity, and Mary knew better than to push him. "I am so sorry, Mary." He whispered with sadness.

She frowned. "For what?"

"For bringing mom back in to our lives." He whispered. "I never thought that there could be anything worse than losing your mom as a kid. Growing up like we did. The amount of times I wished everything would go back to how it was, how much I would give to have that happen." He paused. "What we remembered about her when we were kids, a mild mannered school teacher, a loving mother who would do anything for her kids. It might have all been based off lies but it was nice. And those traits, they are what I loved remembering after she went. But now, knowing what she is, what she's done and what she continues to do. I hate her Mare, I hate her so much."

"Where is this coming from? What has she done now?" Mary asked with trepidation.

Steve shrugged. "She's taken one more thing from me that I can't forgive her for." He paused. "And there really is no coming back from it."

Mary studied his expression, she could see he was hurting. "You gave her far more than I did." She whispered. "You gave her so many chances to come back into your life and she screwed you over every single time. That's not your fault. That's all on her. She didn't deserve you."

Steve inhaled the warm summer air. "She recruited Catherine to the CIA." He looked at his sister. "Can you believe that?" he whispered, a bitter smile crossed his lips. "It's come full circle. She fakes her own death, she shatters our childhood, we lose everything."

Mary's eyes drifted down.

"I join the Navy, I meet someone who I knew from day one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Then mom comes back and changes the course of everything again." He paused. "She is doing the same thing she did to Dad." He pushed back the urge to breakdown. "I just want to know what I did wrong. I want to know why she hates me so much that she could even consider doing what she's done. What did I do to deserve this?"

"Nothing. You did nothing." Mary responded as she wrapped her arm around him. "Steve, stop, this is not you. You get knocked down and you get back up again, that's what you've always done. That woman doesn't have the right to make you feel like this. She's nothing except toxic."

"What you say makes sense." He replied. "But it's not that easy to do." he paused and sighed. "She may not have the right to make me feel like this but she has. The worst part is that she just doesn't care. She's supposed to care." he squeezed the bridge of his nose. "I'm getting tired of picking myself up again, Mare."

"You still love Catherine?" she asked softly.

Steve hesitated for a moment before he nodded. "More than I should." He whispered.

"And Lyn?"

He sighed. "I mean, I love her too. But…"

"I get it." Mary nodded. "You know. I always admired you and Catherine's relationship. With what we thought had happened to mom, and seeing Dad so lonely, it made me push boyfriends away. I was scared to get too close to them because I just always believed they would go. I just didn't want to go through what he went through. The ironic thing is that now I'm a single parent. Just like he was." She continued. "But you, you went the other way."

Steve looked to her.

"You and Catherine, had a relationship so deep and special. That's a once in a lifetime thing, some people don't even get half of what you guys had."

"And I didn't realize that until it was too late."

"Doesn't have to be too late, Steve. If she feels the same way, she'll come back."

Steve looked at her, he couldn't face telling her the whole story. "Yeah, maybe." He whispered. "You know what, Mare? I'm so proud of you. With what you have with Joan, I never thought you'd still have her. But you totally proved me wrong, and this is one of the rare times where I'm over the moon to be wrong."

Mary smiled and nudged him with her shoulder affectionately. "It's not easy, and there has been so many times where I could have given up. But she needed me, and to tell you the truth, I needed her."

Steve smiled lovingly.

"Listen. We stick together, no matter what." Mary continued.

He nodded. "No matter what." He whispered.

"I love you so much." She whispered, hugging him tightly. "Don't ever forget that."


	3. Chapter 3

Steve leant against the counter in the bathroom, his stomach churned with the thought of his current situation. How would he cope with potentially seeing Catherine meet a horrendous end? Watching her life slip away in front of him with absolutely no power to change her fate? Could he have done more to save her before she left? Could he have fought harder? Could he have convinced her to stay had he shown her the ring?

His distress suddenly shifted to anger. Anger for his own actions. Anger towards Catherine for her hiding this from him. But most of all, a deep rooted and inextinguishable anger towards his mother. Even out of sight she was ripping his life apart the way she had done when he was a child. She was nothing but a monster.

"Steve?" Lynne whispered as she approached him.

He looked up into the mirror, catching her eyes and her expression of concern.

"Danny said you were up here. He said something had happened, but I had to talk to you." She said softly.

He sighed as he stood up straight before turning. He perched himself against the counter.

"What? What is it?" she asked cautiously. "Is it something to do with guy downstairs?"

He inhaled a deep breath, turning away for a moment before focusing on her again. "You remember me talking about my old CO. Joe White?"

"Yeah." She nodded.

"Well that's him. He and an officer from the Navy just showed up." He paused as he struggled to say the words. "It turns out that Catherine is in Syria, she was working for the CIA."

Lynne parted her mouth with shock.

"She's been captured, and she is scheduled to be…" he couldn't finish the sentence.

Lynne frowned with genuine sorrow. "Oh my god…" she whispered.

"They think they have a location, and there is a team ready to move in, so hopefully they can get them out alive." Steve continued. He was nervous about what he still had to say. "But I have to be there. I want to be there, watching the feed as they go in." he paused as he studied her reaction. "I need to know that she is okay."

Lynne nodded. "Of course." She answered encouragingly. "Of course you should."

"You don't mind?"

"Steve." She shook her head. "When we first started dating, you told me how much you loved her and you said you doubted that it would ever change. You told me that you would understand if I stopped things between us right then and there."

Steve's eyes drifted down.

"It's tough living in her shadow, I won't deny that. I know that she is what holds you back from moving forward. But I came into this relationship with my eyes wide open and with a complete understanding what Catherine meant to you. Then; and now." She paused. "And, although I'm petrified of where this whole thing might leave us, this could be what you need to move forward in your life. Either with her, with me, or with someone else." She nodded as she cupped his cheek in her hand. "What I'm saying is; I understand why you have to do this."

His heart broke, she had a magnificent amount of patience and an understanding that was second to none. She was perfect in every way and yet she was right, this could be the catalyst to the end of their relationship. Where he would chose a woman who left him twice, lied about what she was doing, and yet still held his heart.

"Thank you." Steve whispered.

She smiled softly.

H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50

Joe led the way through the halls of the Operation Command Centre at Pearl. Steve held back a couple of steps, both through respectful habit for his old CO coupled with trepidation. On the inside his heart paced uncontrollably, his stomach churned and his knees felt weak, but on the outside he remained completely composed.

Joe arrived at a door, scanning his proximity card and opening it up before inviting Steve through into the vast, wide yet dimly lit space of the Command Centre. Personnel shuffled around the rows of desks lined with computers. A hum electrified the room as people spoke almost under their breath. The large screen on the wall at the front of the room was illuminated, showing only a blue screen for now.

Thankfully Steve knew the protocol for this kind of operation, he knew what this room was about and how it worked. Nothing there was threatening to him, but he knew the familiarities would end as soon as that screen was brought to life with a live feed. Never before had he observed a mission which carried such great personal value to him. That's when he would have to face the unknown.

"How are you doing, son?" Joe asked softly as they took position at the back of the room.

Steve glanced at him coldly. In no way was he ready to forget Joe's involvement in this. Another betrayal from the man who had one time sold himself as a father figure.

"Look, I get you're angry with me, and I understand." He whispered. "But when this is over, I hope that you will allow me the time to explain."

"You mean I give up an hour of my time to listen to more lies, Joe?" Steve answered bitterly. "Yeah, I'll have to seriously consider that."

Joe didn't even want to argue the point. This was not the time nor the place, and there was no way he could reach Steve until this was over.

The screen flashed up with a shaky feed from a helmet cam. The black and white image of a group of soldiers huddled around a large gate. Guns grappled and at the ready.

"Here we go." Someone in the room called out.

Steve felt his chest tighten with an overwhelming barrage of nerves.

"Tango 341, you are a go." Commander O'Neil announced through his microphone.

"Tango 341 copy. We are a go." A voice replied through scratchy audio, as the group burst through the gates with such fury it was natural to feel sorry for anyone who was on the receiving end.

For the first part of the assault the visual feed was broken and hard to follow through all the sudden movements they made as they systematically swept through the area. Shouting in both English and Arabic could be heard between the long stints of automatic gunfire. It felt like an eternity as the team cleared the structure room by room. The primary search had been completed and with that the feed became more stable.

"This is Tango 341, heavy weapon store found, 12 hostiles down, no sign of hostages. Initiating secondary search."

"Copy that Tango 341." O'Neil replied with little emotion.

Steve frowned, this couldn't be right. They had it on good authority that the hostages were there, so what happened? And why did he seem to be the only one concerned by this.

Joe turned his head slightly, towards Steve's direction but failing to make eye contact. Even he seemed like he was unshaken by this outcome. Perhaps they knew something else? Perhaps this was the first stage of the operation? Perhaps there was a secondary location where the hostages were being held?

Steve stepped closer to the screen that dominated the large wall. His eyes scanning through the images against the operational brief which was positioned to the side. This didn't make any sense. This building seemed to be the only target.

"Tango 341, secondary search is now complete. No change to our initial report, the hostages have not been located. I repeat, the hostages have not been located."

"Steve…" Joe whispered as he placed his hand on Steve's shoulder.

"Where is she, Joe?" he asked. "Where are the hostages?"

"I don't know." He said softly.

"They had good intel." Steve replied as tears welled in his eyes. "Good intel which you all believed was pretty much a guarantee the hostages were at this location."

"You've been in this business long enough to know that good intel doesn't always yield the results that we wanted."

Steve turned to O'Neil. "Have they checked for concealed entries to subterranean floors?" he asked desperately, refusing to believe this was the end.

"They've cleared the entire building." O'Neil nodded.

"They must have missed something."

"Lieutenant Commander." O'Neil answered. "I understand how upsetting this must be for you, but I can assure you that the team on site know exactly what they are looking for and they haven't found it."

"What if they were tipped off and they moved the hostages before we showed up? We could track them."

"Satellite has been surveilling the compound since we got the coordinates." O'Neil responded. "Nothing has gone in or out that would suggest they'd moved the hostages."

"Okay, so there must be other targets that were credible." Steve replied.

"There was one, but nowhere near as solid as this one."

"But you could redeploy the team to that location." He pushed desperately.

"Even if we could get the green light from the Pentagon, it's a five hour drive from their current position. They would be entering hostile territory blind because there was no plan drawn up for it. Steve…" O'Neil answered helplessly. "I'm sorry. I really am. I wish this had the outcome we were all looking for but it is what it is, we had one shot, there is simply nothing more we can do for them."

Steve turned, placing his hands on his head and sighing with desperation. He took a moment before looking back to O'Neil. His eyes burning through him. "So what happens now?"

"We wait." He replied.

Steve pushed back the disgust and utter emotion. "We wait for their deaths to be broadcasted to the world?"

O'Neil's eyes floated down. "I'm afraid so."

"Come on Steve." Joe whispered. "Let me take you home. I promise that as soon as these guys know anything then we'll contact you."

"No, you've done enough, Joe." Steve growled softly. His eyes filled with an unmistakable fire.

Joe sighed.

"I'm done." He continued menacingly. "I'm done with you, I'm done with my mother, and I'm done watching good people, people I care about, who have served this country with distinction, get screwed over by the very institution they swore to protect." He paused as he glared at Joe. "I can't, I won't, do it anymore."

Joe nodded gently.

Steve walked over to the door and disappeared.

H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50

By the time he'd reached home again the warm breeze was filled with a mist of soft rain, gently falling on the surrounds which offered that fresh rain smell. There was a distant rumble of traffic on the highway, the sign of an island filled with shift workers be it military, hospitality or other. But the sound of the waves crashing was somewhat comforting to Steve. It was like it was hardwired in his mind that this was home, this was a safe and happy place, and yet hardly any of his history here really reflected that.

He stepped through the front door, eager to close it behind him on the world. Dropping his keys on the counter and sliding off his jacket he hadn't taken much notice of any signs of who might still be around. His eyes were drawn to a line of people who stood somberly by the doorway to the kitchen. Kono, Lou, Chin and Danny. His o'hana. His light.

"Boss?" Kono whispered with hesitation, shaking her head softly and shrugging.

Steve quelled the emotion which bubbled in the pit of his stomach. His eyes drifted down. "The mission was a fail. The hostages weren't there; Catherine wasn't there."

Chin closed his eyes and looked away. Kono submitted to the tears that had formed, submissively allowing them to fall down her cheeks. Lou shook his head with genuine sadness mixed with a sliver of anger and Danny, well Danny knew that he needed to be 100% there for Steve. "What does this mean now?" he asked.

Steve's eyes reconnected with his best friend before glancing at his watch. "It means that, in the next thirty minutes, those hostages are going to be taken out." He paused as his face winced with sadness. "And there is nothing that anyone can do about it."

"They should have told you." Kono whispered. "They should have told you when they first found out."

"No. Joe and Danny, they were right. I would have been compelled to go over myself, going in completely blind with a rough shot at a plan. It was taken out of my hands, and I'm trying not to blame myself for that."

"You wouldn't have gone over alone." Kono stepped towards him. "Whether we would have agreed with it or not, we would have all gone with you. Catherine is our family too; and I don't think any of us would have passed up on the chance to do whatever we could to get her back home."

Steve nodded gently, his pride was brimming but short-lived when he was reminded that in reality they were never given the chance. "Lynne?"

"She went home." Kono answered softly. "She said you needed time, but if you needed her she was only a phone call away."

He nodded gently.

"What do you wanna do? You want us to leave?" Danny asked.

Steve swallowed the lump in the back of his throat. His natural instincts were always defaulted to not showing weakness, not letting anyone in, but this was too much for him to handle and he recognized that. "No." he whispered. "If someone could stay, I'd appreciate that."

The group looked around to each other, almost as if one was going to pick the short straw but in fact it was the opposite.

"I don't need to be anywhere." Kono shook her head.

"Neither do I." Chin answered.

"Renai loves a good night's sleep without my snoring anyway." Lou smirked gently.

"I'm taking the couch." Danny nodded.

H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50 H50

Steve had insisted the others get some sleep, somewhere around 3am. He'd tried to close his eyes himself a couple of times but Catherine's face seemed to haunt him, and his anxiousness was high waiting for the dreaded phone call which would confirm the worst. He'd made his way outside to the white chairs that had a permanent place, offering the breathtaking view over the ocean. He'd thought through so many of life's predicaments out here, it was almost a therapy area where he could naturally start to see things more clearly. But not this time.

The sun had started to rise over the crystal clear turquoise water to the left of him, it's warm orange glow had turned a palm tree, that stretched out toward the water, into a perfect silhouette. Specks of clouds added depth to the sky, catching the suns beams turning them into magical colors. The waves crashed softly to shore, pushing its gentle surge of water up the beach over the golden sand. It was another magnificent Hawaiian sunrise, and yet the world seemed so much darker for him today. He struggled to even notice its beauty or its colors.

As the sun raised further into the sky he was consumed with thoughts of what he could have done to stop her from leaving that day. He had been so close, as she walked to the car, to proposing. Would it have made her stay? Would it have changed her mind? If he knew Catherine as well as he thought then it probably wouldn't have swayed her, but then there would always be the doubt. If she had just told him what was happening he could have helped her. He could have understood. He could have gotten her out. But at the same time he also accepted that what she was doing was a mirror to what his mother did, and that Catherine would've known he'd never see it rationally.

Danny appeared, sat down next to him and sighed.

Steve glanced at him before looking back out the ocean.

"Anything?"

"No." he whispered. "Nothing."

"Maybe they changed their mind? I mean these people don't execute without broadcasting it. That's their political gain. Maybe it never happened."

"I don't know Danny, I don't know what to think anymore."

"I think you should just keep believing that no news is good news." Danny whispered.

Steve inhaled a deep breath and nodded somberly.

"Steve." Chin's voice said softly from behind the pair. "Joe's here."

Steve looked at Danny, in one expression his best friend could see his heart shatter into a million pieces. He stood up and walked quietly towards the house.

Danny stood up and started to follow him when Chin reached out for him.

"You know what?" Chin said softly. "You should let him go alone."

"Someone needs to be with him."

"There's a reason why you don't want to be in there right now. Trust me." Chin nodded.

Steve hesitated as he got to the door, thumping his closed fist against the wall with sorrow. Squeezing his eyes closed, desperately trying to contain his sadness. It took a few moments for him to conjure up the composure and the strength before he walked through the glass doors and through to the living room. His eyes locked on to one person, his face creased with disgust and fury.

"Hello, Steve." Doris whispered.


End file.
